Car Radio by twenty one pilots

A/N: So here’s another songfic! It’s for the song Car Radio by Twenty One Pilots. I’m not too incredibly proud of it, because I had planned on it going different/better, but I decided to post it anyway. Why not, right?

I can’t take it I can’t take it I can’t take it I can’t take it
I gritted my teeth as I glanced to my right, staring down the space where my stereo used to be. Out of habit, I had almost reached my arm out to turn on the music.
I would have, if it was still there.
It would still be there, if somebody hadn’t stolen it.
The fact that it was gone wasn’t helping my mood, but I couldn’t help but think about it. It was times like this when I needed the radio. Not necessarily the radio itself, but the distraction its sound gave me.
In the silence, my mind wouldn’t shut up.
Failure you’re such a failure why can’t you realize you don’t deserve to be here—
The light turned green, and I pushed the gas pedal. A little too hard—my back slammed into the seat behind me.
Get a grip, Tyler. I slowed down my speed, easing up. It’s okay. Just breathe.
But I couldn’t.
Worthless.
The air.
Failure.
Wasn’t.
Useless.
Breathable.
The driveway of my destination came none too soon. I pulled in behind my visitor’s car, putting my crappy vehicle in park and turning off the ignition. Even though the house was right in front of me, though, it seemed so far. Much too far to walk. I couldn’t move. My hands still rested on the steering wheel, because I didn’t have the energy to lift them. I was leaned forward, too tired to push myself back so I could slouch against the seat. I was so exhausted, but my mind was in full motion. With the silence, there was nothing to distract it. Every mistake I had ever made, every humiliation I had ever experienced, all of the regrets I had. I thought about every one of them, the past being played like a movie behind my eyes. I wished I could escape myself.
I sighed heavily and closed my eyes, leaning my forehead against the wheel, between my hands. My migraine was growing due to all of the screaming my conscious was doing. It was ironic, because all I wanted was for everything to be quiet, when really not a sound was being made.
I don’t know how long I stayed there, feeling my heart beat pounding against my chest and focusing on breathing in, and out. It might’ve been minutes. It might’ve been hours. It had long ago grown cold due to heat being off, and I started to shiver under my grey hoodie.
Suddenly, there was a rapping against the glass. I jumped and turned to see Nick with his fist raised against my window.
“Tyler?” he asked. “Hey, man, come on inside. It’s cold.”
Somehow, this brought me out of my reverie, and I unbuckled my seatbelt with shaky, numb hands and climbed out of the car.
“Still haven’t replaced that radio, huh?” he asked me as we started to walk up the path.
I just shook my head.
“Well, silence can be golden.”
“Bullshit.” I opened the front door for him and walked inside after him. “I liked it better when my car had sound.”

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Thank You for Goodbye

A lot of people in my life have left me, in one way or another. Don’t worry, this isn’t a post all about my complaints. I’m not here to depress you.

Most of the time, the person just cuts off all communication with me, without saying why. Other times, they’ll drag me out, occasionally replying to my texts, but with no meaning behind their words. I thought these were the only two ways.

I’m not stupid. I realize I’m a very difficult person to be friends with. When people want out, I usually let them (yes, I am aware this sort of make me a coward; I wish it wasn’t that way), and even though I’m sad, I don’t hold it against them (unless they do it in a mean way and suddenly become this person who makes fun of me like our friendship didn’t exist and they never talked to me before). It’s not a big deal. It hurts, but I understand (sometimes).

However, I had a friend who recently did something different. We talked everyday, and he seemed to genuinely enjoy our conversations as well. Anyway, recently things have come up and changed, and he doesn’t talk to me anymore. I thought I never would again, but then one Friday afternoon he proved me wrong.

To put things simply, he told me goodbye without actually saying it. I didn’t realize this fact until later, about an hour after I got home. It was a nice change.

Basically this whole post was to say I appreciated that he told me goodbye. I hope I didn’t confuse anybody too much… Can anybody relate to my situation?

Catchphrases

If you know me, even just for a little while, you’ll figure out that I like to use catchphrases, most of them a bit odd. Some completely made up. Some of my most common ones include:

• “Geezus on a boat” (my version of “oh my god”, I guess)
• “love”
• “peasants”
• “I’d like to fly” (meaning I wish I was somewhere else)
• “oh my stars” (another version of “oh my god”)

It’s just a habit of mine. The thing I don’t understand is why people genuinely cannot stand to talk to me just for this reason. How are my catchphrases any more annoying than “swag”? It’s not like I’m using them every two seconds, so what’s the big deal?

What’s your opinion on this? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear what others think.

When the Day Met the Night (by Panic! At the Disco)

A/N: I was listening to the song When the Day Met the Night, one of my absolute favorites, and decided that I was going to try and write a songfic, because what better do I have to do? It didn’t turn out as well as I had hoped, but here it is, a story I wrote off of Panic! At the Disco’s briliant song. I would recommend listening to the song as well, if you haven’t already.

Part One

The Sun was walking down the road, kicking up rocks as he passed them. His job was nearly over with for the day, thank the Lord. All he wanted to do was rest. Luckily, the clouds had come out and helped him again today, so he hadn’t had to do much work, but it was still necessary for him to be present, and he hadn’t been in the mood. He had been looking forward to finally being able to lay down in bed all day.

He came across the local garden, and didn’t really give it a second glance. It was a location he passed nearly every day on his walks. The flowers, as always, were in bloom, looking radiant in the light and full of colour. He didn’t think it would ever be an important place, just one that was there. It didn’t really serve a purpose except giving the sky another pretty feature. With all of the storms that had been going on lately, though, maybe it was useful, something beautiful to admire in the mess.

It was pretty sad that a local garden was better kept and probably more expensive than his apartment.

He would’ve kept on walking, would’ve stayed in a bad mood, but he happened to turn his head. To this day, he still does not know why he did it, but something made him want to look to the left and peer over the fence.

There, in the corner of the garden sitting on a large stone bench underneath a weeping willow tree, he saw her. She was wearing a silver dress and black hat, drinking out of a china cup.

Without really knowing what he was doing, The Sun started to walk forward, turning at the corner to the entrance. Absentmindedly, he unlatched the lock to the fence and swung the door open. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her. Her hair, that was such a dark shade of brown it was nearly black, blew along in the wind with the branches above her. Who was she? Why had he never seen her before?

She didn’t look up from her book as he approached her, not realizing his presence. She took another sip of her beverage– tea, by the looks of it.

“Hello,” he finally said, hoping he didn’t startle her. He didn’t, at least it didn’t look that way. Her eyes flicked calmly up to him, revealing a brilliant grey colour.

“Hi,” she replied, breaking out into a smile. “Do I know you?”

“I don’t think so,” he replied, taking one step closer. “My name is The Sun.”

“I’m The Moon. It’s nice to meet you.” She closed her book and carefully set it to the side. “Would you like to sit down?”

“Sure.” He was instantly covered in shade from the overhanging tree as he took a seat next to her, careful not to touch.

“What brings you to the garden?” The Moon asked. “I’ve never seen anyone else here before.”

He couldn’t exactly tell her the truth. That would be sure to send her off running. He didn’t need yet another person doing that right now, so he shrugged. “Just wanted a bit of fresh air after work, is all.”

The Moon examined him, this blonde guy who looked so sad, despite his pleasant demeanor. There was something in his eyes that made him seem as if he was barely hanging on. She wondered what was happening in his life. He must be in a bad place. Or maybe she was just over reacting and over evaluating, as always.

He was gorgeous, despite the storm cloud that seemed to be hanging over him. His blonde hair hung nearly down to his light blue eyes. The Sun. The name fit him. He was so opposite her, with her dark outfits and makeup. He was light, she was night.

“What do you do?” she asked curiously. “For a living, I mean.”

He lifted his arms, gesturing to the space around them. “I provide the sunshine. I didn’t do a very good job today, though, did I?” He frowned up at the clouds.

The Moon’s eyes got big. “You’re the person I take over for!”

He scrunched his eyebrows in confusion at the excited girl. “What?”

“I go to work when you go home. I’m The Moon, the one you see in the sky while it’s dark out.”

His face lit with understanding. “Oh. That’s why we’ve never seen each other!”

“Speaking of which, I need to go.” The Moon stood up, grabbing her book. “Almost time for me to clock in. It was so nice to meet you, though.”

The Sun looked up into her eyes again, those eyes that were clearer than water, the dark grey that took his breath away. “Maybe we could see each other again sometime?”

The Moon hesitated. She was still on guard from her last break up, and her walls had only just been rebuilt. “I don’t know…” she muttered uncertainly.

“Just to chat,” he assured her. “Just to sit and talk for a little while.”

“And what would I get in return?”

He thought about this. “How about… a smile.” It was probably the best he could offer.

“I would like that. Tomorrow? Same time?”

“I’ll be here.” Maybe even a little bit earlier.

The Sun watched her stride away, her sparkling shoes catching the light as she walked down the sidewalk until he was left alone in the garden during the hot summer day. The bitter feelings returned, but that’s when he realized something: when The Moon had been around, he hadn’t thought about them at all. He actually felt… happy.

The Moon made her way down the street, not able to quit smiling like an idiot. She knew that she shouldn’t do this, shouldn’t get caught up with someone else. Had she not just made a vow to forget about boys for a while? You would think she had learned her lesson from the last Star that had broken her heart. This guy would not be any different, no doubt. It was inevitable! At least she and the Star had some things in common. She was completely the opposite of The Sun. There was no way a relationship of any kind would work out with him.

Then again… maybe it would work out because of their differences.

Plus, there was one similarity.

She looked up, at the fading light. So that was him, the mystery person she had never met but was pretty much the only other one like her. Sure, the Stars provided light as well, but she was the main factor of the sky, as self-centered as that may seem. She felt bad for The Sun. At least she had Stars to help her on the job, and some nights she got time off, during the new moon. The Sun was always the same. Always there.

The Moon pulled her hair back and tied it in a knot before continuing on, trying to make the heat of summer a little more comfortable to walk in.

“Tomorrow,” she muttered to herself. “I’ll tell him to leave me alone tomorrow.”

Part Two

Days passed, and The Moon and The Sun got to know each other better. With their work schedules, it was hard to meet up, but somehow they always managed to get a little time to talk wedged in. The Sun still had his insecurities, and The Moon still had her worries, but they could tell by the way they procrastinated leaving until the absolute last second and how they craved more conversation and never failed to come up with topics to discuss that something about the two of them was right.

Whenever The Sun would look into The Moon’s eyes, his cares slipped away, and all that mattered was the conversation going on between the two of them. He hadn’t wanted this to happen. He had finally starting to learn to be an independent guy. He had just been hanging around, not looking for anyone, and here he had come across The Moon. He hadn’t decided if it was for the better or the worse yet.

The Moon wished she could say she grew more and more cautious with every coming night, but it would be the very opposite of the truth. Every time she saw The Sun again, her heart skipped a beat, and any idea of rejecting him seemed silly. If he were to kiss her, she wouldn’t know if she would pull away or not. She knew that she wouldn’t want to, but she knew that she should.

It seemed like they both had issues they still wanted to figure out, but one afternoon all of it was pushed to the side. They were sitting on their bench, nearly touching but not, leaned up against the back of the stone seat, craning their necks up, looking at the large willow.

“Is it just me,” The Sun said, “or does it seem to be cooling down a little these days?”

“It’s you,” The Moon replied with a laugh. “It’s still only the middle of summer. It won’t start to get cold again for a while yet.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”He glanced sideways at her. “Are you okay?”

“Yes. Are you?”

He gave a short laugh. “I’m never okay. But you seem a little off tonight. You sure nothing is bothering you?”

She gave a long, slow sigh. “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”

At this, The Sun sat up straight. Now he was the one with a worried look on his face. “What? Why?”

The Moon avoided his eyes, fidgeting with the hem of her dress. She wore the same thing every day, but never failed to look stunning. “I don’t…” She trailed off.

“You don’t what?”

“It sounds so stupid.” She shook her head. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t want to fall for you, and I feel like I’m headed down that road soon.”

“We don’t have to completely break off communication, though,” he replied, trying to reason with her. “We can still talk, and stay friends.”

“But I don’t want to be just friends.”

“Then we can be more.”

She looked over at him in surprise, seeing the lazy smile sketched across his face. She did love it when he smiled. It made the whole place brighter—literally.

Finally, after much silent consideration, she took another deep breath. “Okay. As long as you can promise not to break my little heart or leave me all alone.”

“How could someone bear to do such a thing to a girl like you?”

“It’s happened before.”

The Sun paused, then decided to take a risky move and reached out for her hand, grabbing it gently with his own. When they intertwined their fingers, a strange thing happened: the sky turned into a golden pink colour, the in-between of light and dark. The two looked around in amazement and broke out into laughter.

“I suppose you have to get going, then,” The Sun said sadly.

“Actually, I’m free tonight.” The Moon grinned. “It’s a new moon.”

Part Three

He had only fallen in love one other time, but he knew what it felt like, and it was pretty much exactly what he felt when he thought about The Moon, only now it was stronger. He also knew that there wasn’t even the hope of a possibility of getting out of it. What was worse, he didn’t think he wanted to.

Despite her better judgment, The Moon decided to free her heart of any doubts and be carefree for once, because whenever she saw his bright face, or was held in his arms, she felt safer and happier than she ever had before, and there couldn’t really be anything wrong with that, even if in the end they didn’t work out. She trusted The Sun, trusted him not go behind her back about anything, which wasn’t exactly an easy task, what with them being away from each other for so long. It was, however, easier than missing him was.

He had finally told her what was bugging him, venting all of his emotions out on a breezy night after enough coaxing from The Moon. Apparently, anybody he had ever cared for had left him in one way or the other. One of his best friends, a Star, burned out a couple years ago, and since then everything seemed to have gone downhill. He was lonely. That was enough to depress anyone. He discovered, though, that the depression could be lifted. All he had to do was look into her eyes, and he felt whole again, like he served a purpose. Simply the thought of her helped him pull through.

His favorite part of the day was when he finally got to see her after the long, hard day of work, for that bit of precious time before it was time for the sky to turn dark, and she had to go (unless, of course, it was a good night, one with a new moon). Her favorite part of the day was finally getting to kiss him before leaving to go to a long, hard day of work.

When they did, the sky turned a brilliant shade of gold, and it made the waiting worth it.

Just an Update to Say Hello and Whatnot

Hey everyone! I jut wanted to say thank you to those people who have followed me! There may not be too many but I didn’t expect to get any at all so I really enjoy knowing you guys like this! Also, I’m going to start posting “songfics” that I write occasionally on here, but in addition I will be posting them to the new page as well, so you can just click on that and read through them if you want instead of scrolling through the home page trying to find them. Any suggestions on making them better are appreciated, if you decide to take a look at them! The first one is When the Day Met the Night, and I’ll be posting it in a second. Hope you enjoy!

Always

He turned to her, a small smile slightly sketched across his face. “You’ll be okay.”

She turned to him. “How can you be so sure of that?”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Well, I’m not, but I’ll be here to help if you need it.”

That’s what she heard, but that’s not what he remembers.

She has always read too much into things, and this was no exception. As much as she cares about him, he will never realize she’s there. But that’s okay. He still helps her, even if he doesn’t realize it, and that’s enough, because as pathetic as she feels about it he still helps her get through the day.

And she will always be thankful for that.