What I Think of Blurryface

So I’ve been asked by a surprising amount of people what I think of the new music from my favorite band, twenty one pilots.

Unlike some fans, I wasnt worried. Only merely curious. When Fairly Local was released, I was not disappointed. Tyler Joseph seems to know me better than anyone else I know. I have been trying to explain that it sometimes feel like I’m not in control for ages. It feels like I’m not the one who does some of the things that I do, like there’s another person who shuts the real me away and takes over for a while. In my opinion, that’s part of what the boys are portraying with Blurryface. The way they make his eyes red, the way they blame him for being evil… It brought me to tears when I first heard it. They just understand. They get it. They get how hard it can be just to wake up even when there’s not something life-threatening facing you. And it’s very relieving to have that in my life, where many things are not understood. I usually get pointed at or laughed at or teased or even yelled at for the way I am. Tyler doesn’t do that, because he knows what it’s like. They’re quite the duo, actually. Tyler tells me it’ll be okay and shows me he knows what I’m going through, and then there’s Josh to make me smile. They’re like the best medicine I could ask for. I look up to them infinitely.

If you haven’t heard the new music, I recommend doing so. The songs are called Fairly Local, Tear in My Heart, and Stressed Out. Hopefully there will be another release soon! The album releases on 15 May and tickets for the Blurryface tour are on sale now.


My friend sent me this and said I could post it if I rewrote it

I saw you at a concert the other night for the first time

I was surprised by what I saw

I wasn’t sure what to expect,
Maybe a really excited you or a crazy you,
But in reality you weren’t either of those things.

At first, while we were waiting for the show to start, you looked so uncomfortable, so panicked.
all of those people were choking you, and you couldn’t breathe, and there was no music to distract you except for the instrumental the venue was playing
You had your eyes shut tight and you were struggling not to cry,
But then the lights dimmed and they walked out.
You opened your eyes,
And you laughed
A laugh of relief,
A laugh of love and happiness

You were looking at this band with such admiration,
That it was almost more enjoyable to watch you watching them than watch them myself.

You’d seen them before, I know
But you’d think this had been the first,
What with the way you would look so surprised every time they played a song

Towards the end, I got kind of worried

You started to cry at the second to last song
And I wanted to know what was wrong

But then I noticed
You still had that admiration in your eyes,
And every once in a while your smile would flicker back
I realised you were just remembering the times you had heard this song
And remembering how it had helped you,
Like you told me it did before

During the finale, your hand went in the air, reaching toward the band members
And you looked so heartbreakingly happy
And the lights from the stage reflected your tears
But you didn’t care for once that anyone could see them

At the end of the show, you screamed thank you over and over and held up a sign that said the words themselves on it
And I thanked them too
Because anyone who helps someone like they seemed to have helped you
Deserves to be thanked

Skeleton Clique


So I got this scarf as a late Christmas present. And I love it. Like, a lot. My neighbor stopped me while I was on a walk and was like, “Hey, I made you this so you can add it to your Skeleton Clique collection.” I am completely obsessed with it and plan to wear it to the twenty one pilots concert in April (which oh my gosh I am so excited for!!).

Car Radio by twenty one pilots

A/N: So here’s another songfic! It’s for the song Car Radio by Twenty One Pilots. I’m not too incredibly proud of it, because I had planned on it going different/better, but I decided to post it anyway. Why not, right?

I can’t take it I can’t take it I can’t take it I can’t take it
I gritted my teeth as I glanced to my right, staring down the space where my stereo used to be. Out of habit, I had almost reached my arm out to turn on the music.
I would have, if it was still there.
It would still be there, if somebody hadn’t stolen it.
The fact that it was gone wasn’t helping my mood, but I couldn’t help but think about it. It was times like this when I needed the radio. Not necessarily the radio itself, but the distraction its sound gave me.
In the silence, my mind wouldn’t shut up.
Failure you’re such a failure why can’t you realize you don’t deserve to be here—
The light turned green, and I pushed the gas pedal. A little too hard—my back slammed into the seat behind me.
Get a grip, Tyler. I slowed down my speed, easing up. It’s okay. Just breathe.
But I couldn’t.
The air.
The driveway of my destination came none too soon. I pulled in behind my visitor’s car, putting my crappy vehicle in park and turning off the ignition. Even though the house was right in front of me, though, it seemed so far. Much too far to walk. I couldn’t move. My hands still rested on the steering wheel, because I didn’t have the energy to lift them. I was leaned forward, too tired to push myself back so I could slouch against the seat. I was so exhausted, but my mind was in full motion. With the silence, there was nothing to distract it. Every mistake I had ever made, every humiliation I had ever experienced, all of the regrets I had. I thought about every one of them, the past being played like a movie behind my eyes. I wished I could escape myself.
I sighed heavily and closed my eyes, leaning my forehead against the wheel, between my hands. My migraine was growing due to all of the screaming my conscious was doing. It was ironic, because all I wanted was for everything to be quiet, when really not a sound was being made.
I don’t know how long I stayed there, feeling my heart beat pounding against my chest and focusing on breathing in, and out. It might’ve been minutes. It might’ve been hours. It had long ago grown cold due to heat being off, and I started to shiver under my grey hoodie.
Suddenly, there was a rapping against the glass. I jumped and turned to see Nick with his fist raised against my window.
“Tyler?” he asked. “Hey, man, come on inside. It’s cold.”
Somehow, this brought me out of my reverie, and I unbuckled my seatbelt with shaky, numb hands and climbed out of the car.
“Still haven’t replaced that radio, huh?” he asked me as we started to walk up the path.
I just shook my head.
“Well, silence can be golden.”
“Bullshit.” I opened the front door for him and walked inside after him. “I liked it better when my car had sound.”